everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
Randomize