We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I need moral support for this bender
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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