Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
this will be a night to untag.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
