no, he came in my armpit
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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