Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
