so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize