NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
i just google imaged poop.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
