Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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