I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
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