you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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