It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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