I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize