i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize