As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
