I'm eating all of the evidence.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
The beers last night were like the tears from god
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Randomize
