Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize