We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
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