It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
