Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
