Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
