I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
