"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
