Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
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