i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
