i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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