is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
