I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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