Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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