Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
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