belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
This is classic penis vs brain.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Randomize