Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I think a kid would responsible me up
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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