This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
