nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
Randomize