So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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