Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
Of course I have a pirate flag
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize