do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
