yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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