my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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