How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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