So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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