he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
pray to the hookup gods
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
