i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Randomize
