your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
