I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
