I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
