areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize
