Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
tequila makes me forget i have legs
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
there is glitter all over my balls
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