Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Drake has all the answers
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
