you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
