I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
